Not officially a whole year but since I rarely have the motivation (or time and energy) to write these days it’s as close as it could get. Since then I’ve met several new people that have changed my life for the better. And I got to know me more better, too. Realizing some aspects of my personality I never knew as well as had me second guessing what I wanted in life.

Did I want to have kids for myself or was it for my mom who I’ve always yearn to make happy? What makes ME happy? What type of lifestyle did I want? A house? A condo or even an apartment is fine with me. What’s truly the most important thing for me? Now, next year, next decade, until my final days?

Is it wise to fully invest everything into someone? All your resources, your time, your effort, your love? I still don’t know. The optimist in me knows the answer is yes, for the right person. But the realist? … still a hard pill to swallow honestly. Some say we should stop looking, the right person will find us. But what if they’re not looking, too? Or completely blind and jaded? Many won’t get everything we want in this lifetime. Even those that ask for the bare minimum. We’ll try, we’ll hope but we shouldn’t expect. Shouldn’t.

Honestly, I don’t know where I’m going with this blog post, or this blog period. I was reminded I had a blog when my credit card was charged to keep my domain name lol. And I love flayedsyntax. It’s me. Even if folks I didn’t want got a hold of it.

I’ll just do my best.